''Old days''

Well guys I decided to post a diary entry that is before I knew Bella and before Rosalie was changed we were on our way to the denial clan, as we got there Tanya was fixing to leave to go hunt so she asked me to go with her, I haven’t been hunting in a while so I went with her, I was watching her hunt thinking why couldn’t I just love her what’s wrong with me I mean she is beautiful she has long curly strawberry blonde hair. She dropped her dear and stood up winked at me, and lunged at me knocking me to the ground she was straddling me, her long locks flowing down her face her eyes glowing with excitement she bent her head down and whispered ‘’ are you sure you don’t want me?’’ I looked at her I looked deep in her eyes trying to force something but it just wasn’t happening I grabbed her waist pulled her up kissed her softly on the cheek ‘’I am sorry Tonya I just don’t feel the same way I don’t know what is wrong with me, I wish I could love you but it just not enough’’ she sighed grabbed my hand I didn’t pull away ‘’isn’t there something I can do I mean I have showed my interest in you b-b-but you don’t return it’’ she looked at me her eyes filled with pain from the rejection , her head leaned closer to mine her lips a inch away from mine, but she didn’t kiss me she just put her forehead to mine, ( what did I ever do, I have showed my interest in him, but he hasn’t returned it do I keep trying , or do I just let it be?) Tanya kept repeating in her head on and on, later that night I was looking up at the sky the clouds were covering the stars, it seemed just like my heart there were no stars in my world all covered up by darkness, pain and loneliness, Carlisle could feel that he was starting to worry about me I tried to tell him everything was okay but he never listened, as I was laying in the cold snow when Tanya sat beside me for a while before she said anything ‘’Edward?’’ I looked up at her ‘’um ugh I know you can read my mind but I thought I would ask anyways, why don’t you find me attractive’’ she blurted out any other guy would have been surprised but not me I already knew it was coming up, ‘’Tanya It not that I think you are beautiful it just that I think of you more like a sister not a lover ’’ I lied, Carlisle and I were on our way home when he smelt blood a lot of it, we ran to it, and it was a girl she had long blonde hair, her clothing was ripped up , her hair had chunks missing she had a bruise on her left arm starting to show up she had a hand print across her face that was solid red, as we grew closer I could hear her mind she was waiting for death to take over, she was cold and was in a great deal of pain, we now could see her body laying limp on the road, the snow started to get harder she was shaking now, and she kept thinking about a man named Royce in her head she kept repeating I am such a fool how could I not know he was drunk, he was slurring his words when he yelled come over here rose you have kept us waiting a long time, at that moment only thing I could think about was why was he waiting for me, as I walked over his breath hit me, and at that time I knew he was drunk, his friend yelled at him I can’t see her she has all of that stuff on he pointed at her clothing, the guy named Royce had a smile on his face, he grabbed her hat pulled it out of her hair, making hair come out with it , he ripped her jacket off of her and I am not going to write the rest diary. Carlisle grabbed the jacket wrapping Rosalie in it, and then picking her up and running full speed to our house, he ran her into the attic, right when Carlisle bit into her wrist his thoughts came up (I am making Rosalie for you Edward) I gasped realizing what his mind just said ‘’ Carlisle I don’t even like her you should of heard the snared comments in her head about us!’’ I yelled.
Dear diary it is day two of Rosalie burning alive, or shall I say changing, I can’t believe Carlisle would do this to me, Rosalie is screaming right now begging for us to kill her, Esmee just got back from hunting she feels so bad for Rosalie, she wants to do something to help her, and right now Esmee is mad because I was going to take Rosalie up on her offer to kill her, but Carlisle was there to protect her, it is my time to watch Rosalie while Carlisle hunts, so I guess I’ll talk to you in a little while.


I am back diary, and like yesterday morning Rosalie was still begging for us to kill her, I hate being there when someone changes not just because they are in so much pain, but because I can hear there every thought so it is like I am burning with them, I wish I couldn’t read minds tomorrow Rosalie will wake up and then she will decide if she wants to live with us or go out on her own.
Rosalie woke up she didn’t believe us, but once she found her throat burning she knew she was something, as her thoughts came up about running away, I gripped her arm tight she flinched away I realized that she was never going to trust any guy ever again, Carlisle explained our diet and told her she could go her own way, but she felt uneasy after that part of being alone she didn’t want to be alone so she took Carlisle offer, but it turns out she hates me more than I hate her, so I guess Carlisle can’t force us together, I guess I will go diary Rosalie wants to go hunting again…
Thank you for reading Edward Cullen diary


‘’love Edward<3’’